@@@@@Hadlock's Beneva Road office on the
@@@@@Hadlock's Beneva
Road office on the dotFreemantle's Theorem of
Office Waiting states that one must add thirty
minutes to the time of one's appointment to arrive
at the time one is actually seen, but in this case
I was pleasantly surprisedThe receptionist
called my name at only ten past the hour and
ushered me into a cheerful examination room where
a poster to my left depicted a heart drowning in
fat and one to my right showed a lung that looked
charbroiledThe eye-chart directly ahead was a
relief, even though I wasn't much good after the
sixth line
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A nurse came in, put a thermometer under my tongue,
took my pulse, wrapped a blood pressure cuff
around my arm, inflated it, studied the readout
When I asked her how I was doing, she smiled
noncommittally and said, "You pass Then she drew
bloodAfter that I retired to the bathroom with a
plastic cup, sending Kamen bitter vibes as I
unzipped my flyA one-armed man can provide a
urine sample, but the potential for accidents is
greatly magnified
When I returned to the exam room, the nurse was
goneShe had left a folder with my name on it
Beside the folder was a red penMy stump gave a
twingeWithout thinking about what I was doing, I
took the pen and put it in my pants pocketThere
was a blue Bic clipped to my shirt pocketI took
it out and put it where the red pen had been lying
And what are you going to say when she comes back?
I asked myselfThat the Pen Fairy came in and
decided to make a swap?
Before I could answer that question - or consider
why I had stolen the red pen to begin with - Gene
Hadlock came in and offered his handwhich in my case was the right oneI
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found I liked him quite a lot better when he was
divorced from Principe, the goateed neurologist
He was about sixty, a little on the pudgy side,
with a white mustache of the toothbrush variety
and a pleasant examining-table mannerHe had me
strip down to my shorts and examined my right leg
and side at some lengthHe prodded me in several
places, enquiring about the level of painHe
asked me what I was taking for painkillers and
seemed surprised when I told him I was getting by
on aspirin
"I'm going to examine your stump," he said